Spandex is almost as restricting as this fucking town.

melissapenderghast:

I’ll save it for the floorwork routine.

image

Christ, if that were legit, I’d be torn in half from the pussy up. Fuck that, seriously. I’m onto something anyway, those shitdicks are keeping my trophy safe. It’s rad to be back on the circuit again, even if I’ve got pricks like you staring at my crotch.

When’s that again? Need to mark it down on my calendar. 

Fuckin’ fabulous mental image. You’re the one puttin’ it on display. You gonna do splits and shit in the air and expect me not to look at it.


4/23/14, 8 notes VIA

Spandex is almost as restricting as this fucking town.

melissapenderghast:

image

Nips and all, it’s a free for all for those pervy intergalactic bastards. Might as well be naked.

Might as well. 

I hear if your stuck with a cunt wedgie for too long you can harm nerves in your bean. If I were you I’d be quitin’ that sport quick fast.


4/23/14, 8 notes VIA

Spandex is almost as restricting as this fucking town.

melissapenderghast:

image

I could probably spot that camel toe from space.


4/23/14, 8 notes VIA

4/23/14, 6,984 notes VIA

What the hell just happened?

itsgillianstupid:

So fun, the best is having cops know you on a first name basis and knowing exactly how fast you have to eat all the meat in your freezer before the electricity gets cut off [She gave a thumbs up] No, nobody what about you? Still dating that hard 7? image

Oh yeah? And how long is that? [He let out a gruff chuckle.] Yes and fuck you, although shit I gotta say… I feel shit for cheating on my old girlfriend but I’m kind of hating this one girl thing. Get’s boring as shit after a while.


4/20/14, 95 notes VIA

What the hell just happened?

itsgillianstupid:

[She pointed to herself]  Alcoholic and an asshole crook, the alcoholic split when she found out I eat pussy so at least I didn’t have to deal with that. [She reached over and pinched his cheek] If there was a crack baby beauty pageant you’d have it in the bag image

Hm, sounds like fun times at your house. [He rolled his eyes.] Yeah, thanks. So, you had your eye on anyone particular tonight?


4/20/14, 95 notes VIA

What the hell just happened?

itsgillianstupid:

Most of the girls I sleep with I’m their dirty little secret so I don’t have to deal with dads, so I guess that’s a perk. There was one girl whose mom dragged me out of her daughter’s bed half naked by my hair. image I don’t recommend it. 

I’ve had a shotgun held at me so… I guess I get it. It’s usually rich girl’s that have the crazy parents. I’m just the disgusting crack head’s son.


4/20/14, 95 notes VIA

What the hell just happened?

itsgillianstupid:

No dude, that was just weird imageShe said and I quote ‘Our night was special to me, I thought it was for you too’ [She put her first to fingers to her temple and pretended to pull a trigger on a gun] 

Ah, classic drunken mistake. It happens, I’ve still got girl’s dads yelling at me as I walk down the street, ask ‘em who their daughter is and I’ve never heard the name before.


4/20/14, 95 notes VIA

What the hell just happened?

itsgillianstupid:

image I don’t even remember that girl

You fuckin’ player.


4/20/14, 95 notes VIA

alice-johnson-reynolds:

[text] Yes, I'm drunk. And you're annoying. And tomorrow morning, I'll be sober but you'll still be annoying.

[text]: Bite me.

4/20/14, 0 notes
TH